Chapter 3 - Lillian Dawn – The image of Life and Happiness

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Lillian Dawn – The image of Life and Happiness

  

Mom was born in HotCoal, West Virginia. The town no longer exists. It became a ghost town when the coal was depleted from the local mines. 
 Shortly after Lillian, was born, her parents, Tom and Margie Hodges, decided to return to North Carolina in 1925. Margie’s brother, Taylor, also brought his family out of West Virginia. After experiencing the grueling life in a coal town, the young families grew homesick for their home turf. Margie and Taylor worried about brother Wyatt who decided to remain as a foreman in the coal mine. 

Tom and Margie settled in the small town of Mount Airy, just a few miles from the Hodges’ farm in Dobson. Tom found work as a salesman at the local grocery store and they rented a house on Mineral Street. They had room for Tom’s brother, John Henry, who also worked at the grocery store. The 1930 census showed that they had a boarder named Carl Hawks. The boarder was likely Margie’s cousin, as her maternal grandmother was Thursa Hawks. Carl worked in a button factory. Life in Mount Airy was pretty good for the Hodges in the 1930s.

Mount Airy is a little town in North Carolina. Besides the granite quarry and farming, people found work in textile, furniture, and tobacco factories.  The fictional TV town of Mayberry was inspired by Mount Airy, the hometown of the actor Andy Griffith who was a schoolmate of Lillian. Andy’s family lived a few blocks from the Hodges on Haymour Street. Mount Pilot on the TV show reflected the real-life neighboring town of Pilot Mountain, named for the very distinctive rock formation that the Saura Indians called “Jomeokee,” meaning “great guide” because it served as a beacon.  The European settlers of the1700s wiped-out the Saura, not by armed conflict but by the diseases they brought from Europe. They had no natural immunity to small pox and other diseases endemic to Europe. There is archeological evidence of the Saura in the area but little else remains.

The Andy Griffith museum is a popular tourist attraction in Mount Airy today. In the basement of the museum is an exhibit highlighting the life of two other famous residents of Mount Airy. The world renowned conjoined twins, Eng and Chang Bunker from Siam, who came to be known as the original Siamese twins, settled in Mount Airy in 1845 after touring Europe and the United States. For a while they were part of PT Barnum’s freak show. They married sisters Sarah and Adelaide Yates; they had 21 children and their grandchildren would have been contemporaries of Lillian and her sisters.

As I researched the Mount Airy newspapers, I discovered that the town was not the bucolic, southern Shangri-la represented on the TV sitcom. My great-great grandparents would have viewed Mount Airy as a busy, dangerous place. In fact, there was a reputation attached to the town. Mount Airy was a sort of “Gretna Green” for runaway lovers. This means it was like Las Vega, a liberal place for a quickie wedding. The term “Gretna Green” refers to the original Scottish town where, in the 18^th century, young British couples would flee to get married without parental consent.       

It was common for area farmers to take their harvest to Mount Airy to sell in the wholesale markets. In 1921 my great-great grandfather, Wiley Nations, brought his tobacco crop into town, spent the evening, and returned to his Dobson home the next day, but not without incident. On the way home, he got into an altercation with an African-American women, named Bess Gwyn. She hitched a ride with great-great grandfather. Halfway home he stopped to pick up groceries while Bess continued to walk. For some unknown reason, Wiley would not let Bess back on the cart. When she held onto the cart, he threatened her with his horsewhip. Angry Bess threw rocks that caught Wiley in the head. This incident was reported in the Mount Airy News and is all the more interesting when you consider that it happened in “Mayberry”. How do you think Sheriff Taylor would crack the case?

Surry county and the rest of North Carolina had a drinking problem. Even before the country as a whole addressed it, there were many who were firmly opposed to the demon rum. North Carolina was the first state in the South to ban drinking. Alcohol Prohibition became federal law in 1920 with the passing of the 18^th Amendment to the Constitution; however, North Carolina had already passed voter supported referenda forbidding the manufacture, transportation, sale, or use of alcohol. From 1908 to1920 North Carolinians had to bootleg their booze from Virginia and South Carolina. Mary Hodges (great grandma) was not shy about her support for the anti-drinking laws. In 1959 she supported the ban on liquor stores in Mount Airy. When national prohibition ended in 1933, North Carolina remained one of the states which did not ratify the 21^st amendment. In 1937 an Alcohol Beverage Control (ABC) system was established to sell spirits. However, some counties remained “dry” for years. Today Graham county is the only dry county in North Carolina. In reality, the laws did very little to curb the consumption of alcohol. The courts were overwhelmed with cases of people charged with alcohol related crimes.

In 1927 it was not unusual for owners of cars and horse-drawn buggies to battle over the hilly roads in Surry County. Sometimes the two cooperated. It was not uncommon to tie up a team of horses to pull a mud bound auto onto dry ground as great-grandpa did one day.  Nathan Hodges’ neighbor, Fred Lewellyn, slid his Ford coupe off the road into the mud near Nathan’s farm. Nathan's horses easily pulled the car out of the mud. As the car reached dry ground, Fred was slow to pull the brake. The car continued to roll, spooking one of the horses. The horse reacted by kicking the snot out of the coupe’s radiator. The story made the evening news. I guess it might still be newsworthy if a horse kicked a car today.

Life was good in Surry County. Tom and Margie enjoyed taking their four girls to visit their grandparents, the Stantliffs in Fancy Gap, VA, and the Hodges in Dobson, NC. Nathe and Mary enjoyed the visits. Mary especially liked having some girls around. She loved her daughter-in-law and her little girls. Mom once told me about visiting Dobson in the winter time. They were caught in a blizzard coming home from church one Sunday.  Papa Wiley Nations(great-great-grandpa) had sheltered the girls under blankets on the back of the horse-drawn wagon. As the blizzard raged, the girls were cozy under the blankets but the girls decided to check on the weather. Giggling, they poked their heads out to see a very undignified Papa Nations. His normally gray beard was now white, completely covered in ice and snow. Under his nose were two frozen icicles of snot.  The image surprised the girls, they shrieked in delight, and then giggled and squirmed back under the blankets. Mom had a bit of a giggle in her voice when she recited the memory. The vivid memory seemed to have been seared by the extreme cold and the telling of it seared it into my memory too as if she had imparted the memory to me.  

Margie was glad they returned to the mountain area where they had so many loving relatives. Margie had four brothers and one sister, while Tom had five brothers. There were many noisy gatherings of grand parents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. The Stantliff's origins trace to my 6^th great grandfather, James Stanclift, who immigrated to Connecticut from Yorkshire, England in 1680. My 4^th great grandfather, William Stanclift, married Esther Adams who was the daughter of U.S. President John Quincy Adams.  William Stanclift’s grandson, Oliver Stantliff, brought his family to Virginia around 1810.

One of Lillian’s uncles was a fast-talker. He was an auctioneer. Margie’s brother, Gollie Hasten(GH) Stantliff, was an auctioneer and a real estate agent. He regularly had his picture in the advertising section of the Mount Airy news. He had the look of a serious businessman. He wore glasses. He was tall, six foot one. He was broad shouldered and weighed 215 pounds. In December of 1929, he received a little too much attention in the news. 

One Sunday he took a potential buyer, Marcus Prevette, for a ride in the country to review some property. They were accompanied by two others. All of this driving in the dusty hills made the friends thirsty for “mountain dew”. I am not referring to the popular soft drink but to the moonshine, which was quite illegal at the time. Returning home, they took the curves too quickly on Pipers Gap Road. The car overturned. All four survived the crash and remained in the car. As Marcus climbed out of the car, it rolled over onto him. He cried for help, but the others could not save him, and the weight of the car crushed the life out of poor Marcus Prevette.

GH Stantliff was charged with manslaughter and driving under the influence of liquor. He took a good tongue lashing from both his wife, Martha, and his mother, Rachel (Faulkner) Stantliff.  Clearly, a moment of poor judgment can forever change lives.  The support of family and friends is what got GH through this very trying time. Similar to today’s crowdfunding, his neighbors rallied and raised the bail to get him released from jail. There would be several court appearances and many character witnesses. The case was eventually dismissed.  

GH changed his ways after that. Eleven months after the accident the newspaper reported that he had joined the Missionary Baptist Church in Chestnut Grove. Chestnut Grove was in Lambsburg, Virginia- just north of the border from Mount Airy. GH didn’t go to church alone. Lillian’s mother, Margie, joined the church that same day. Both were baptized the next Sunday. Missionary Baptists, like Southern Baptists, were the ones holding tent revivals and sending missionaries out into the world. The Primitive Baptists did not believe mission work was necessary because only “the elect”, those chosen by God himself, would be granted salvation.  Missionary Baptists, being more progressive, allowed instrumental music in their church services, offered Sunday school, and believed universal salvation by faith. It’s in these church services Lillian came to love the hymns we heard her sing.  It takes little effort to bring to mind her joyful sounds that filled our home. - “Rock of Ages, cleft for me. Let me hide myself in Thee” and “Amazing Grace, How sweet how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me”.

Meanwhile, back in West Virginia another uncle of Lillian’s, Margie’s brother Wyatt, had some troubles of his own. Wyatt was the foreman of a coal mine. Late one night in January 1931, he was shot to death by another foreman. Herbert Canterbury claimed he fired in self-defense while he and Wyatt were quarrelling. Like today’s perp-walk, Canterbury was marched into court attached to the chain gang. He was found guilty but there were conflicting news accounts of his sentence.  It was either five or eighteen years of prison along with road construction for the murder of my great-uncle.

In North Carolina, the Mount Airy news first reported that Wyatt had been killed in a mining accident(Fake News) and that he had many friends and family that mourned his passing. Imagine the family’s shock when they learned that my great uncle was actually shot to death.  Tom and Margie lamented that if Wyatt had not remained in West Virginia, their family would have been spared this tragedy.  

Life goes on. Tom and Margie worked hard to make a happy home for their four girls: Lorraine, Lillian, Tommy Lou, and Ramona. Tom was happier than he’d ever been. Walking home from work he anticipated the greeting that awaited him. He would be smothered with hugs and kisses and called “sugar” as Margie encouraged the girls: “Daddy’s home. Let’s give him some sugar.” Margie kept up the home and the girls went to the local public schools.

“Red- Red, Curly Head”..that was how the kids would tease Lillian.  She had a beautify head of red hair which set her apart from the other children in her class. Kids can be cruel. They annoyed Lillian and nicknamed her “Red”. Oh, she hated it! Her father told her she should ignore them. “They only tease you because they get a reaction”. Even though the advice never worked, Lillian passed it on to her sons when they would be hurt by name-calling children. ”Sticks & stones may break my bones” and so on.  Tom would take off his hat to reveal his bald head with fringes of auburn hair.  “You can blame me for the red hair,” he told her. Still, she found no solace. Years later she would look back and think those were the good ol’ days.

Lillian was 10-years old in February 1936 when her 71 year old grandfather, Nathan Hodges, died. Tom’s father had endured a two-year ordeal after being diagnosed with cancer in his eye and ear. I take small comfort in knowing that morphine was commonly available to help patients endure the pain that accompanied that dreaded disease. Many friends and family came for the funeral in Dobson to care for and comfort his wife, Mary (Great Grandma Hodges).  A few weeks later the family would gather again, but this time it was a happy occasion, the wedding of Lillian’s sister.  Lorraine married Roscoe Closson on March 28, 1936. She was 16 when she married and moved to Roscoe’s dairy farm in Madison, NC. Before the end of the year, there would be another gathering - another funeral.  This time it was Lillian’s father, Tom, who had succumbed to lung cancer. Mary Hodges grieved over the loss of another son, while Tom’s girls were devastated at the loss of a husband and father.  The Hodges brothers: Batie, Frank, John Henry and Lonzie were shocked too. They had no memory of the brother, William, and the other siblings that they knew were buried in the dinky forsaken cemetery on their father’s farm. But their mother remembered each baby as if it were yesterday. Mary wept bitterly even as she tried to console Margie.

Margie was concerned about how she would care for her three young girls aged, eleven, eight, and three. She found part-time work as a seamer at the knitting mill. Ten months after Tom’s death, she married Bill Hastings, an auto mechanic, and moved to a house in White Plains, part of Mount Airy. The girls’ step-father would sign their report cards which they brought home from White Plains Elementary.  It was here in White Plains, at the age of 13, that Lillian, like other girls her age, started sneaking and smoking cigarettes.  Not that it would have made a difference, but cigarette packages did not have the warning labels they carry today.  Margie and Bill would later divorce, and in 1944, Margie would marry her third husband, a plumber named Edgar Haynes and her fourth husband, Jesse Geer in 1954. To my brothers and me, he was Grandpa Jesse. We remember him as a happy, warm, and tender man who bore the calloused hands and dark wrinkled leather skin of a southern laborer.

Mrs. Killinger's Sixth Grade 1939-1940

Lillian’s uncles must have given the four girls great comfort-keeping the memory of their father alive. I know that visiting with Uncle Lonzie and the other uncles helped me to envision a grandfather I never met. Lillian was a typical brooding teenage girl. She got pretty good grades in school. Her best and favorite subject in school was music.  Her favorite thing to do on Saturdays was to spend the day watching movies at the Earl Theater in Mount Airy.  For the ticket price of ten cents, she could enjoy two features. She liked the musicals most of all. She enjoyed Top Hat with Fred Astaire & Ginger Rodgers. In 1939 the Wizard of OZ was first released. She dreamed of singing in movies like the young Judy Garland. Shirley Temple movies were another staple of the time.

Musically, it was a special time to be growing up in the Appalachian region. Isolated, as they were, caused the residents to learn to entertain each other. Socials such as husking bees would include work and merriment. There would be all sorts of music and dancing.  Settlers brought the quadrille from Europe, which the country folk adapted into their popular from of square dancing. Clogging was another dance style embraced by the southern Appalachians. In fact, clogging is the official state dance of North Carolina. Its origins credit Irish, English, Scottish, and Cherokee dance steps mixed with African rhythms and style. Lillian and her sisters were great cloggers. One time while visiting Aunt Tommy Lou, she organized a party and dragged me out to clog up a storm. Dancing with my aunt was pure joy. She clogging like a pro and me doing “I don’t know what” induced that endorphin high on the dance floor similar to what athletes describe as ‘runners rush’.

The Appalachian region also spawned unique musical styles. What was first called “hillbilly music” became “old time music” and then Bluegrass was produced using string instruments like fiddles, banjos, and guitars. One very particular style of this genre is called “Round Peak”. It’s named for the town in Surry country adjacent to Dobson and Mount Airy where Lillian grew up. Round Peak is a particular style of music created by differently tuning the fiddle and a fretless banjo. Famous Round Peak musicians include Tommy Jarrell and Fred Cockerham. Lillian loved music, and the music that was part of her DNA was “old time music”, “hillbilly music”, and Bluegrass. Movies and music was Lillian’s refuge. 

In 1943 Margie divorced Bill Hastings and moved the girls to Winston-Salem. In May of 1944, Lillian’s younger sister, Tommy Lou, married a local man named Wm. K McDaniel. Margie married Edgar Hayes in November.  Surrounded by married women, Lillian grew impatient. She desperately wanted to have a family and, at the age of 19, had little confidence and no prospects. She agreed to marry Ed King, the first suitor who came along. It didn’t take long for the three women, Margie, Tommy Lou and Lillian, to realize that they had all been too anxious to marry. Their hasty unions would end in divorce. The three women would find enduring love in their next marriages. Tommy Lou would marry James “Dennis” Hendricks in 1951. Margie married Jesse Geer in 1953. The youngest sister, Ramona, married Bill Ramey in the same year.

Sisters: Ramona, Tomy Lou, Lillian, Lorraine, cousin Kenny Hendricks (1956)

In 1947 Lillian found work in a beauty shop in Winston-Salem. Like many women of the age she wanted to train for a profession, so she enrolled in a Texas cosmetology school to become a certified beautician. She shared a Houston hotel room with Ruth-Ann, a fellow student where each night they laughed and complained about their no-good husbands. Lillian told her roommate how she lost her hearing in one ear, the penalty for back-talking the wrong man at the wrong time. With their new certifications, they felt independent and emboldened.  With linked-pinky-fingers they sealed their solemn oath: “Neva goin’ back!”

To celebrate their graduation, Lillian and Ruth-Ann went out to see a movie. That was the evening Lillian was captivated, she met Albert Bennett. She was momentarily angered when Albert called her “Red,” but she was instantly charmed by the handsome Yankee in the aviator jacket.  They went into the theater together; Lillian sat between Ruth-Ann and Albert. Lillian was so entranced by Albert’s charms it’s unlikely that she would have heard any of Ruth-Ann’s warnings: “You don’t know anything about him,” ”He’s a Yankee,” “You just got out of a bad relationship.” However, Ruth-Ann’s admonitions literally fell on a deaf ear. Lillian’s auditory impairment allowed Albert to have Lillian’s undivided attention. She fell deeply in love that night, followed him home, and with the aid of New York City, Albert completely seduced Lillian.  

Irresistibly Albert

On a date - Albert & Lillian in NYC circa 1947

To be continued ………

What to do next ?

 NEWSPAPER CLIPPINGS

FAMILY TREE

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